Riverdale’s secret shame

I got into comics through Archie. As a kid, I think I had two giant rubbermaid containers filled with Double Digests. I grew up on this shit, and only really revisited it within the last year – those comics are messed up. At the core of it, the story is about two female best friends who are hooking up with the same dude and simultaneously hate each other and have BFF slumber parties. That is a hella toxic relationship! Also, he is making kisses with like a plethora of other ladies. Archie is a ho! That shit would not fly in any high school I’VE attended.

I’m just saying, Archie’s junk could probably be a lab specimen.